Feelings
What To Say
I saw a post today with a chart about what not to say to someone who is depressed. Then many people commented that it’s unhelpful to only post what not to say without offering suggestions of what might be most helpful to say. Here is an incredible education in what to say when a friend…
Read MoreReleasing Control
I am ready to stop trying to control my heart and my feelings. I am ready to release control of trying to feel the right amount of feelings or order my feelings to arrive on a certain schedule that is synced up with someone else’s feelings. I am ready to give up trying to control…
Read MoreSelf-Compassion
During this time of year, I’ve come to understand that there will likely be an emotional release at some (or several) point(s.) I over planned and under-felt my way though the last week, maybe even the last few weeks or more. Now that it’s over, a bubble I’d been living in burst and I realize…
Read MoreCore Stories
Some ideas, statements and beliefs are harder and edgier for me to wrap my mind around than others. It’s likely because they go against some of the core stories that I’ve known or told about myself over the past 4 decades. It’s not that I am unable to reconsider or edit these core stories, but…
Read MoreExpectations on Gratitude
I am sometimes aware of deep, spontaneous pockets of gratitude for my life. Possibly because I have lived extended periods of time not feeling grateful to be alive, I am so overcome when the gratitude rises up and takes over from the inside. It always feels like a miracle. I don’t ever expect it, but…
Read MoreListening
I find that listening is a gift whether I am the one with open ears and an open heart or I am the one speaking. It’s often actually very challenging for me to just listen, more so with those that aren’t used to being listened to and tend to ask questions or feel uncomfortable with…
Read MoreAwakening
The woman I was a few months ago would not have believed that I would take a workshop called Burlesque from the Inside Out – choreographing and performing a powerful solo piece in a cabaret show in a San Francisco theater! This is the point where Kellita the Showgirl Shaman shimmied her way into my…
Read MoreSupport
Today I’m moved by my own strong desire to feel supported in my life. Support for me feels like connection, listening, calling, showing up, checking in, offering, loving, communicating, making time, encouragement, patience, and presence. I know there is a wide net of love that exists for me. And there are times, like today, that…
Read More#metoo
Every time I see, hear or read the name Ben, I think about the Benjamin R. Holland, who I was on the Swimming & Diving Team with at Kenyon College, who had sex with me without my consent. Even now as I write this 20 years later, I hesitate to use the word rape because…
Read MoreDepression
It’s been a long time since I wrote a long post. This has been on my mind for a while and tonight I wanted to share with you some very raw, personal thoughts. Depression is something that I’ve had a lot of experience with for a really long time. I’ve done a lot of research,…
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