Me & White Silence

One of my most dangerous mistakes regarding racism has been to view the word itself as vulgar and it’s meaning only as overt expressions of hatred, superiority over, or prejudice against of BIPOC (Black Indigenous People of Color.) With that definition, there was no way that it applied to me. Not questioning, reevaluating or expanding…

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Me & Tone Policing

What I have learned about myself and tone policing is that I center myself, my comfort and feelings over the content & context of what is being expressed to me. I have pushed back from conversations (and friendships) because I have thought to myself, “All they ever talk about is race.” “I can’t handle the…

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Me & White Fragility

I’ve learned that my White Fragility is a way of centering myself as a victim and attempting to get others to care-take my hard feelings when I encounter racial stress or discomfort. I’ve noticed my fragile white behavior occurs when it’s been easier and more familiar than acknowledging the overwhelming prevalence and unfairness of structural…

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Me & White Privilege

I’ve learned that my white privilege has allowed me to be incredibly ignorant and believe that I wasn’t complicit in the atrocities of racism people of color experience constantly. My white privilege has allowed me to think that I was better than and more evolved than outspoken racists, white supremacists, the alt right, Trump supporters,…

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Change

Almost 20 years ago, in my early 20’s, I was living in San Francisco. I was in a relationship with a man from Chicago who grew up in a predominantly white, Irish Catholic, working class neighborhood where it was very common for him, and mostly everyone in his life, to use racial and homophobic slurs…

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