moment of beauty

Today I drove onto the Richmond Bridge as the setting sun was perfectly poised above a fluffy cloud layer over the coastal hills. The sunlight beamed across the Bay towards me and cast a golden glow over Mt Tam through a fine layer of fog. I reminded myself over and over to focus on driving, but the beauty was so distracting and I want to somehow capture it.

By the time I crossed the bridge the sun had descended behind the clouds. Glance by glance I saw it go down, briefly leaving behind a bright line across the top of the clouds that looked like lava. And then darkness started to rapidly descend. It was 5:20pm.

Often in a moment of beauty, I think about how I can make it last by taking a picture or how I could share it with others if I could document it well enough. Recently I’ve been remembering to just enjoy the beautiful moments fully as they are happening. This is so much more nourishing to my soul than rushing to try to capture and preserve it.

Beautiful moments happen all the time when I make myself available for them. When I woke up today I had no idea about all the beautiful moments I would experience, the incredible, loving people I would see and hug, the words and songs I would hear and the ears that would listen to me, take me in and allow me to feel a part of something and fully alive in a shared moment.

The perfectly timed sunset as I drove over the bridge was a synchronicity I’ve never before experienced. Sometimes we align perfectly with something we never would have known to wish for. I love accepting this gift without grasping to document it…although I can’t resist telling a story about it. Today I have a feeling of fullness and peace as the day ends.

I am grateful for the abundance that found me and unfolded throughout my day. I don’t take it for granted. I know it’s not within my control to orchestrate but I will happily receive and absorb the love that I find and that finds me along my path through the world.

This is exactly what I need to keep in my mind when what I see and hear in the world is so violent, corrupt, designed to oppress and eradicate, so steeped in hatred and out of control.

Almost every day I can find a connection with a human I didn’t know before and share something meaningful. These encounters keep coming and I keep my heart open one connection and one small moment at a time. I always feel hope when I’ve connected with people around me, even briefly. People are hopeful beings, I believe. Even when we’ve lost hope, I think we are still looking to find it again.

I tell strangers that they look beautiful or have excellent style. I hug people like I mean it because I do. I listen to what people say and ask questions. I’m sometimes shy and feel intimidated, but I step outside my comfort zone because I want to live in a community where we have time to connect, offer to give each other a hand, we ask how we are in a way that allows for a full expression not just as a formality.

There are hundreds of opportunities each day for me to be more present in my life and to continue molding and shaping my impact and imprint one tiny interaction at a time.

This is my personal campaign for change. At a young age, I had a prayer not to create more pain in the world, now it’s expanded to create moments of connection and feeling heard and seen. It’s so small and so private. I likely won’t ever know the impact of these small moments of connection, but my prayer is that they grow like seeds. I don’t know if I’m doing it right, but it feels like me and it’s what drives my spirit and keeps me going.

Some people I meet say that they pray for me or thank god for me. I can’t think of anything more beautiful or sacred than to be included in someone’s private relationship with their divinity. I feel like I truly need all those prayers. We all need all the prayers, all the moments of beauty, and all joy offered within the tiny moments of connection strung through our days and communities.

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