Sunset to Moonrise

Sunset to moonrise hike last night. Listening to a book written 20 years ago about a dystopian future that sounds a lot like today. The imagined suffering that is now real made me cry.

It’s so chronically exhausting to see all that is failing, depleting, exploitative, and toxic, and to know that people in power can be paid to ignore, deny, and let destruction happen. Other people can be paid to weave a massive web of lies to convincing people to align themselves with what they hate and refuse to accept. I can fall down a dark hole with these catastrophic thoughts.

I can find my own destruction within my upset about how we fund our own destruction. I don’t want to let this immobilize me and I also don’t want to turn away from what is happening. I pray every day to understand what balance is and how to embody it.

Praying to the moon for guidance. Calming my spirit as I surround myself with the beauty of this place where hills and trees become shoreline and bay.

Long dry grass shines golden in the sun. It’s that time of year. Lush grass flourishes on the shady sides of hills with all the remaining wild flowers tucking their petals in for the night.

Some deer trails are more overgrown this year. Are there less deer than before or is my perception off? I see less deer than I used to for this time of year.

I see one young buck with two prongs on their fuzzy horns. I see an abundance of tiny birds. I love tiny birds. The cutest mole scurried across the trail just in front of me. All those tiny insects that dance above my head were out as the sun went down. Geese fly by. Turkey vultures and hawks are always keeping watch in their beauty way by soaring about.

There is all of this and more to be grateful for and moved by in this moment. I let the beauty overwhelm me to the same, if not greater, extent that I let the suffering impact me. This is how I try to create balance for myself. I want and crave all of the peace that is available to me to live my life in a good way each day. One foot in front of the other, pausing to take it all in, walking along the road of my life a bit further each day.

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