Lifey
Expectations on Gratitude
I am sometimes aware of deep, spontaneous pockets of gratitude for my life. Possibly because I have lived extended periods of time not feeling grateful to be alive, I am so overcome when the gratitude rises up and takes over from the inside. It always feels like a miracle. I don’t ever expect it, but…
Read MoreEmpowering
I’m proud of the *Brawny Explorers! We were brave, kind and compassionate as we gave out the care packages they put together for folks living on the streets of San Francisco. In 1 hour, we walked around 1 city block and met more than 16 homeless men and women. Witnessing true gratitude (and some relief)…
Read MoreSober
From a young age, I understood that alcohol could make people you love do terrible things and behave really badly. I understood that some people were seemingly able to “drink responsibly” and others did not seem to be able to do that. I thought that alcohol tasted disgusting and didn’t understand why anyone would want…
Read MoreAwakening
The woman I was a few months ago would not have believed that I would take a workshop called Burlesque from the Inside Out – choreographing and performing a powerful solo piece in a cabaret show in a San Francisco theater! This is the point where Kellita the Showgirl Shaman shimmied her way into my…
Read MoreSupport
Today I’m moved by my own strong desire to feel supported in my life. Support for me feels like connection, listening, calling, showing up, checking in, offering, loving, communicating, making time, encouragement, patience, and presence. I know there is a wide net of love that exists for me. And there are times, like today, that…
Read More#metoo
Every time I see, hear or read the name Ben, I think about the Benjamin R. Holland, who I was on the Swimming & Diving Team with at Kenyon College, who had sex with me without my consent. Even now as I write this 20 years later, I hesitate to use the word rape because…
Read MoreChange
Almost 20 years ago, in my early 20’s, I was living in San Francisco. I was in a relationship with a man from Chicago who grew up in a predominantly white, Irish Catholic, working class neighborhood where it was very common for him, and mostly everyone in his life, to use racial and homophobic slurs…
Read MoreHumble
From Humble Beginnings – this postcard is from early 2010…yikes. Many people probably don’t know that my web design business, KojolaPower, actually started as a yoga class. I was cleaning out my computer files today and found this postcard design that I made in 2010. I am totally embarrassed by everything about this design (the…
Read MoreImpatient
I felt very impatient today with the snails pace of change in our world. I watched two powerful documentaries by Jennifer Siebel Newsom, Miss Representation and The Mask You Live In. I feel fired up about so many ISSUES in our culture that contribute to so much pain for so many people. It’s so hard to watch so many…
Read MoreDiving
My dad took this photo of me diving when I was maybe 11 or 12. My young face looks so determined and also afraid. It’s been years since I’ve been on a diving board, but what I remember most about it, all those years and all those dives, is the vulnerability and the fear. There…
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