Own Your Racism

My own racism rears its ugly head while I’m doing my anti-racism work. It happens all the time.

I did my first ever video story today about owning my racism.

I’m getting to know the racist parts of myself that haven’t been acknowledged so that I can more quickly recognize them and stay grounded in my anti-racism work. This doesn’t feel good and challenges my beliefs about myself daily.

I am lucky to have the support of my friends in the Co-Conspirator Lounge so that I can stay focused, accountable and not ghost the process. This note is a quote from Valerie Moore, it’s a good mantra.

After I recorded the live video, I did get distracted. I couldn’t post it because I was overrun with fear that I sound stupid, look ugly and am wasting people’s time. I see how I’ve learned to tear myself down in moments of power instead of standing up and speaking out. After breathing, getting support from friends, becoming calm and regaining my groundedness, I watched the video and decided to post it anyway. It’s not perfect, life-changing or wise, but it’s true, edgy and uncomfortable. I’m willing to walk that line in the spirit of reconciling with the racist parts of myself and becoming a better co-conspirator against racism.