Consciously moving towards what is meaningful.
Meaningful moments occur most consistently when I create time and space for them. Connection with others, with nature, and with myself, all feel meaningful. I’m interested in all the gritty and glorious details of life.
When it feels safe to be my full, authentic self, those moments are full of meaning. The truth always resonates more deeply and feels a certain way in my body.
Common questions like, “How are you?” and “What’s new?” are so simple, but I am often awkward when asked. I don’t know where to begin, how honest to be, or how long I have the person’s attention/interest for. Sometimes my mind goes blank. I sometimes admit my panic at these questions and laugh at myself. Sometimes I cringe as I hear myself saying generic things like, “I’ve been really good. Super busy with work.” Ew.
I can listen deeply, share stories, laugh hysterically, discuss dreams and desires, and feel all the joy, grief, and anger. I can be very quiet or talk for hours depending on how welcome I feel and who I am with.
I prefer to be transparent. Hiding feels like the opposite of healing. When I struggle to be vulnerable or real, there is something to be healed. Its often shame, insecurity, fear, pride, or trauma.
I am a mostly integrated being with full agency and I still find ways to hold myself back. I bump up against my own real or imagined limits, limits of others, and systemic limitations all the time. Sometimes I’m creative in how I meet those roadblocks.
I like the question, “What’s something you’ve been thinking about lately that you feel excited about?” I’ve learned fascinating things this way.
I can imagine saying, “It’s really good to see you. I don’t feel like chatting right now, but I hope we can connect later.” I love that kind of honesty. I love the awkwardness of something unexpected happening.
The more honest I’m willing to be, the more potential there is for a meaningful moment to occur. One of my favorite things is to name something that many people feel, but seldom express. If I can open the door to pointing out behavior that we all do and feel weird about, that is very exciting (and meaningful) to me.